Pick-Up Lines that are (Somewhat) Guaranteed to Get You a Date
Presented by The Conglomerate’s Editorial Board
Happy Valentine’s Day lovely readers! On this absolutely lovely day, we hope that you’re able to spend it with people and things that you love. If you’re spending the day with your significant other… how sweet. We are all so, so happy for you. Have fun doing all the nauseatingly cute things couples do and don’t forget to post about it so everyone can see. If you’re flying solo today – congratulations! You (hopefully) know how important self-love is and would much rather spend the day loving yourself.
However, if you have plans to pick up a little cutie somewhere – aim for a redeemable establishment – we have the article for you. The Congo’s Editorial Board have taken the role as possible matchmakers and compiled a list of pick up lines. These lines are not only personal favorites, but have a somewhat success rate (at least that’s what Kyle says…). So, if you’re out and feeling brave, try one of these lines and see what happens:
Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re CuTe
Hey, I think I misplaced my library card. Is there a chance I can check you out instead?
Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.
I hope you know CPR because you’re taking my breath away.
Even if there was no gravity on Earth, I’d still fall for you.
Are you a chicken? Because you’re imPECKable
Send feet pics…
I’m writing a term paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering if I could interview you?
Your name must be Google because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for.
Wanna eat cookie dough sometime together?
On a scale from 1 to 10, you’re a 9 and I’m the 1 you need.
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
If done right, you should have a cutie instantly hooked by your charms. Or at least you made them laugh, which could be a start! If the line didn’t work… remember no is no and The Congo does not take any responsibility for failed attempts (NOTE: all complaints may be delivered to Kyle Comi – he is more than willing to hear from you).
No matter how you spend Valentine’s’ Day, the EB hopes you know we love and appreciate you all (yes, even you). Thank you for your support issue after issue and words of praise. So, even if you spend the day by yourself, just know this 100-year-old newspaper, which is run by college kids, loves you (maybe don’t think about it too much…).
Happy Valentine’s Day!
